The Enchantress #20 to 21
As of today, tumblr.com has made the bone headed decision to block all access to NSFW blogs on its website. It's become more important to find and record the content on my blog. Starting with the most popular and extensive series that was on the site.
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The Enchantress #20
Hero: Ha Ha Ha! I am the one who contaminated your wells, people of Dono!
Angry Mob: It was you? Not those bastards from Nellorville?
Hero: That’s just what I wanted you to believe! And you fools fell for it! You blamed some stupid Nellorville gangsters for My crime!
Angry Mob: Get him!
Hero: Bwa ha ha! You think you can catch me! See you all later, fools!
The Hero leapt from rooftop to rooftop, easily escaping from the mob of angry villagers. Later, he met up with the Nellorville elders.
Elder man: It is a horrible day. Not only did one of our own commit such a heinous crime, nearly destroying our relationship with our neighbor village and causing a war, but you, the man who killed him, must take the blame.
Hero: But this way I can at least prevent any more death. I assume they’ll have my name in wanted pictures from now on?
Elder woman: Indeed. News will spread. Beware, hero. You will not be able to trek anywhere in this entire country without being hunted.
Hero: It’s alright. That’s actually true of many places in this world. I’ll make my leave now-!
Suddenly there was a thunderous zap. A cloud of magic rose in the distance.
Elder woman: That came from Dono! What is going on?
Hero: I’ll check!
The Hero ran toward the borders of Dono. There he saw, standing in the middle of a mob that must have been made up of the entire village’s population, was the enchantress.
Enchantress: I WILL NOT ALLOW THAT FOOL TO TAKE THE CREDIT FOR MY DEEDS ANY LONGER!
Mob: Who are you?
Enchantress: I am the enchantress! I am the TRUE poisoner of your town!
Villager #1: We don’t believe you!
Villager #2: Yeah! Someone already admit to that!
Enchantress: That man was just a puppet! A poor victim hypnotized by my magic to do my bidding! And as proof…BEHOLD!
With a point of her finger a cloud covered the village. Like a projector, the cloud showed a vision…an vision of the hero lying naked on the Enchantress’s bed as she played with his body erotically. An image of the hero trying to escape as she rhythmically squeezed his male member…An image of him being hypnotized by her glowing eyes…an image of him doing her bidding with a blank expression…
Villager #3: Enough! We believe you! Ugh!
Villager #4: You depraved bitch! YOU CONTAMINATED OUR WATER!
Enchantress: Indeed! Oh ho, indeed! And if I see you giving credit for that to anyone else, I will do much more than that!
With that, she disappeared into smoke. As the Dono villagers scrambled to find her the hero walked away. He covered his face, more embarrassed and humiliated than afraid of being found.
(I don't remember the details of why I wrote this particular story, but I don't really like it all that much, for several reasons. It uses actual names instead of titles, for one thing. It will be established later on as a rule that most people and even whole kingdoms use "titles" like "Blacksmith" or "Village of White Sand" instead of names like "Greg" or "Kakariko Village."
Also, the situation is too convoluted. What's going on is that somebody from a village poisoned the water supply in a neighboring village in an act of terrorism. This could potentially cause the two villages to go to war. So instead the hero volunteers to be a scapegoat to keep the peace, which is apparently something he's already done.
But then the enchantress, in turn, takes the blame from the hero in the most humiliating way she can possibly do so. This is an act of goodwill from her that hasn't been seen yet in the series at this point.
The enchantress will eventually become a more nuanced character in her own right, but I think this particular act of goodwill in the hero's favor is too out of character so early on.)
The Enchantress #21
Bar goers: *Laughter*
Barbarian: Nothing like true love, eh, fellers and fellerettes?
Hero, raising a glass: To TRUE LOVE!
*His fellow bar buddies, a bunch of adventurers and rough-looking folk, agree heartily and down their drinks*
Mercenary: I met my wife in a rival camp. I tried a wrestling hold but she thought I were trying to lift her bridal style. I tried hitting her, and she thought I were hitting ON her! I explain that "no, I'm an enemy soldier" and she says "oh..." And them she knocks me out cold with one punch! She ends up bringing me to their leader and they offer me more money than my old employer!
Bar goers: *Howling with laughter*
Mercenary: I don't even know why they bothered! I couldn't even take out the lady! But yeah, she and I got along well from them on! The wedding was two weeks after all that!
Barbarian Lady: Oh man! Anyone else with a knee slapper? Hope about our youngest friend? Hope about that marriage, eh?
Hero: . . . What marriage?
Mercenary: It's no secret, my man! Even me and the mistress got an invitation! See?
Hero: *Reads invitation* Come see the union of the century... World's most powerful woman will marry cute swordsman... The only marriage where the bride literally rides the groom to the alter...With The Rock n' Roll Sirens playing reception??? What in the Goddess's Ass is this???
Barbarian: Rock n' Roll Sirens is no joke. The Enchantress has called in a lot of favors...
Mercenary: There's even a picture of her giving you a ring.
Hero: That's a cursed ring and she's clearly forcing it on my finger! It turned me into a tadpole for a week! I ate, like, twenty pounds of seaweed!
Barbarian Lady: There's a copy of the marriage form you two signed.
Hero: That was originally a truce pact! We signed it months ago and I hadn't heard from her since!
Mercenary: Clearly she's been busy.
Hero: Well fuck this. I'm leaving the continent until this all blows over. (Hmm, I wonder if the Olympia kingdom needs a hero.)
Barbarian: Hey, I don't know why you're so opposed to marrying one of the world's strongest human female. But if you don't want to marry you, you should probably leave soon. It's gonna be her mating season soon and she's gonna be hunting for you.
Hero: Enchantresses have mating seasons? Like animals do?
Barbarian Lady: Yep.
Mercenary: Oh yeah
Barbarian: Heh heh heh...best time of the year to be single.
Mercenary: In fact, I think it's already started. What are you gonna...hero?
*Everyone looks at the hero's empty stool. The tavern door is swung open*
Barbarian Lady: ...So when she catches him we're still going to the wedding, right? Because the sirens are a rare treat and I don't want to give up the chance to hear them perform live...
Mercenary: I'm not missing that disaster of a wedding. You think they'll even get to the vows?
Barbarian: Best love story of them all, I say.
(Even if it's antiquated, I really like this old story. It's a set up I only touch upon a few times later: the hero surrounded by a bunch of fellow rough travelers. Semi-noble thieves, mercenaries, barbarians, Conan the Barbarian type folk, and just enjoying himself.
Later on, as the hero's circle of friends starts to solidify, he's not usually seen with these people again but I never forgot about them.
Also, I headcanon that, seeing as this story is set too early in the series, that the enchantress wasn't serious about trying to marry the hero. She will later develop genuine feelings for him, but for now he's still an amusing plaything that she finds endearing. This was all to get on his nerves.)
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